The Gang Vs The Mall
by BrocktreeZero
Summary: I'll tell you this: It involves "Murray" , Jonas , and Ax.


The Gang vs. The Mall.

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A mismatched group of friends wandered through the mall, one of them, the smallest, pointing out areas and making suggestions. His twin was busy asking questions to the tallest one, who constantly was shaking his head in unknowing, while the last one, a bulkily built black male, observed all of this without comment. 

The smallest one, Seba, was the leader of the group. His twin, Ax, was wanting to know everything. The tallest one, Jonas, knew not the answers to Ax's questions. The tallish, black one, Teal'c, was silently observing, with a hat pulled over his forehead. Seba asked Ax which store they should go to. "This 'borders' sounds like a nice place to see. I should want to learn more about human culture, and a bookstore seems the ideal place." "Right, so then, borders it is." Seba replied. When they arrived, Seba told them: "find a book that interests you, and I'll see if we can get it." 

They dispersed, as Seba made a b-line to the manga section. Within minutes of searching, he is interrupted by his twin, wanting to know if he could buy an up-to-date almanac. he takes a look at it, and whistles. "Whoa, this thing is cheap. Five bucks? Sure. Hold on to it, and don't leave the store. Got me?" "Yes, I have 'got you.' " He finally gives up his search of manga, and looks for Teal'c. 

When found, he asks him if he has found anything. "I have, Sebastian Dewey. The writer Isaac Asimov seems to interest me." he replies. "Well, than, buy one of his books. He was a great writer." Teal'c than picks up "I Robot". "Now wait for Jonas, and we'll buy that for you. Now let me find Jonas..." 

He than searches about, finally spotting Jonas in the cooking section. "Sebastian! I think I found something!" he yelled. Seba flinched, and told him not to shout. "Sorry. Look! I wonder if you could get me this 'cookbook' ?" "What's it called?" "To Serve Man." "Ah, why not. Lets go to the register. You go round up the others."

At the register, Seba bought all of the books, satisfying all three people. Excluding himself, of course. "Thank you." he said to the lady behind the register. "Having fun? They look like an odd group." she says, smiling. "Family. My twin, my uncle, and my other stepmothers uncle, Murray." He says, referring to Teal'c's public name, and the story that he used to cover up the jaffa's identity.

After leaving borders, they headed to the restroom, where Ax quickly de- and re- morphed. As per the jaffa's surprising request, they headed to the arcade. He explained on the way: "I have heard that 'arcades' have games of skill, with which I may test and improve my skills as a warrior." "Right. You sure you don't just want a break?" he replied, jokingly. "I do not require rest, Seba Dene. Why do you ask?" "Oh, forget it." 

When they reached the arcade, Seba pointed out the shooting games. He wasn't sure, but he thought he saw a faint shimmer of a smile flicker upon Teal'c's visage when he pointed out the Silent Scope machine. Jonas looked around, confused at all the noise and action. "Where and what is this place?" he asked, extremely confused. "This is called an 'Arcade'. It is where human youths often go to have fun, and play games." "This is fun?" "Yes, actually, there are quite a few games that I love." says Seba, rushing to the Silent Scope game, with a pit stop to the change machine. "D'arvit, I can't believe I forgot to give Teal'c any quarters... dolt..."

He found Teal'c trying to operate the Silent Scope machine. "Te- er, Murray! I forgot to give you some quarters! You need to put these in the slot to make it work." he says, slipping in two quarters. "Scoot over, bub. I'll show you the basics." He than proceeds to choose story mode, and start off with a great roll, but that all goes down the drain as he misses, and runs out of time. "Crap! So, you got the idea now, great-uncle?" "Yes, I believe I understand. You attempt to score points by shooting virtual terrorists in certain parts of the anatomy." he replies, with interest. "Yup, that's basically it! Get shootin' , big guy!" 

"Why did I volunteer do this again?" Seba asks himself, after trying and failing to drag Ax away from the space games. "Just one more game of Asteroids! Please! I'm sure I can make the top score this time!" Suddenly an idea strikes him like a thunderbolt. "Hey, Ax, ya wanna go get some cinnamon buns?" he says tauntingly, instantly grabbing Ax's attention. "Are you serious? You'd buy us some cinnamon buns? With icing?" he asked, eyes glazing over. "Sure." Seba replied, sounding, if possible, both relieved and exasperated at the same time.

Ax, having bodily pulled Teal'c from the game machine, accompanied them to the food court. He was explaining the virtues of the cinnamon bun to Teal'c and Jonas, who were listening with what might be called interest. "... and in the middle, they are all warm and soft and gooey and..." He trailed off as he saw that they where approaching the cinnabon. "This is where they vend wonders." Teal'c was grumbling something about having almost reached the top score. "... I can not believe _he_ pulled me away from the game of skill called Silent Scope..." 

Upon arrival, Seba tells them to find a seat, and stay there. He'd order something for all of them. At the counter, he tells the lady he wants seven cinnamon buns. "It's for the family. My twin is obsessive." Than, after receiving the buns, he walks back to the table. "Ax, here is your two, Jonas, here's one, and Murray, here's one for you." Teal'c bites into it, and pulls a face. "This... This is an abomination! This is not food!" Ax's jaw slowly drops. "... ... ... You, you, don't like cinnamon buns! It is impossible! A genetic flaw, possibly?" "No, they taste like old bread with glue draped over them. Disgusting." Said Teal'c, finally snapping Ax.

Later, after a small incident involving Ax being forcibly held back by Seba and Jonas, (Who liked cinnamon buns) they set off for a Planet Music. "Now, guys, don't embarrass me, because I'm gonna go and get a CD. Stay here." he tells them, with such force that even Teal'c flinches slightly. "Yes, sir." Was heard by all three, and Seba stalked off. "I think he is irritated." Stated Teal'c. "You think?" Asked Ax, with his developing sense of sarcasm.

"Well, surprisingly, that went off without a hitch." Says Seba. "Now, to the games store." he says, clutching a new Jethro Tull CD. "Games?" asks Jonas. "Video games. Played on computers." Says Ax, guessing what his twin was going to say. "Yes. Exactly." Says the other twin. When they finally arrive, Seba lets out a sigh, and goes to the PS2 section, plucking out Soul Calibur II. He buys it, and sets off towards the phones. 

He pushes in two quarters, and they land, with a _plink_. He dials a number, and a voice instantly recognizable as general Hammonds says: "Hello? This is general Hammond." 

"Hi, general, this is Seba. We need O'Neill to pick us up." "He'll be right there." he says, barely suppressing an uncharacteristic snicker, as he hung up.

"So, guys, how'd it go?" asked Colonel Jack O'Neill. "Ya, we wanna know!" Demanded Marco. "Very hectic. Ax tried to kill Teal'c for not liking cinnamon buns, they all have a new book, and Teal'c is addicted to Silent Scope. All in all, very fun." All but Ax and Teal'c burst out laughing. "Pay up, Marco. He sounds sane enough." whispered O'Neill. Marco slowly handed over a ten dollar bill. "Shut up. Just. Shut. Up."

How'd you all like it? I spent a week writing it. R&R please, thank you!


End file.
